Interview #10: Kline

klineKline (and Loren, Kline’s mother)

Lake Tahoe, California

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!

1.When did you start using topical steroids? And why?

Kline started at 4 months old for baby eczema.

2. What was the name of the topical steroid?

Desonide and antibiotic compound.

3. Were you ever prescribed more potent steroids? 

His eczema kept spreading and getting worse What kinds? I think dermasmooth was the highest potency we used.

4. How did you find out about RSS?

Google.

5. What made you feel you had RSS?

He looked just like everyone else…red sleeve and all.

6. Were you diagnosed by a doctor? Did you have a supportive doctor?

We saw Dr. Rapaport at 6 weeks off topical steroids to confirm it. Yes, Dr. Rapaport and some homeopathic and chiropractor.

7. What were your first symptoms?

Full body flares.

8. Is your family supportive? Friends?

Yes.

9. Have you ever been to a hospital for this? Why?

No.

10. What has been the hardest part of this condition?

The length of the withdrawal and watching your baby suffer and not be able to help them or speed it up.

11. How long have you been in withdrawal? 

Started February 21, 2012, 4.5 years ago. Kline is still in withdrawal but living his life and much, much better…the itch and skin is managable but not perfect.

12. What do you use as comfort measures during this?

Popsicles, ice packs, lavender oil, EPROMs salt, Shea butter with essential oils, gauze and tape.

13. Are you employed? Has this affected your job status?

I had to take a night job because Kline couldn’t go to school.

14. Has this affected your Kline’s education? He had to redo kindergarten

15. Have you gone to therapy/wish to go to therapy because of this condition?

Yes, I think we all have PTSD and depression from this terrible life changing ordeal.

15. If there is one thing you could say to another sufferer, what would it be?

 

Take each moment by moment ..don’t get your hopes up on a time frame for healing, expect more flares to come. And ask for help! You are beautiful and strong and can do this!!!


Thank you so much, Loren, for taking the time for this interview!

Interview #9: Mattiel Brown

mattielMattiel Brown

Atlanta, GA

“All Things Must Pass” – George Harrison

1.When did you start using topical steroids? And why?

When I was about seven years old, I used Desonide cream very sparingly for eczema around my mouth and ears. This was not the period where I became addicted to steroids, though. I was fine as a teenager and only experienced very occasional, small spots of eczema.

2. What was the name of the topical steroid?

Desonide .05% cream (and I also used some Protopic)

3. Were you ever prescribed more potent steroids? 

Yes, but I didn’t use the whole tube and not for very long.
Triamcinolone cream. Used for small spots of eczema around mouth.

4. How did you find out about RSS?

Video of Dr.Rapaport’s interview on youtube.

5. What made you feel you had RSS?

My eczema was spreading to places that I’d never had it before – my neck started breaking out, my back… it was just a sign that something was NOT normal.

6. Were you diagnosed by a doctor? Did you have a supportive doctor?

Diagnosed with eczema, told that it was a very hard disease to treat. I did not have a supportive doctor until I met a “naturalist” doctor named Dr.Maziar Rezvani in Marietta, GA. He helped me through the later stages of my withdrawal after I explained the situation to him. Very supportive doc.

7. What were your first symptoms?

Rashes spreading to unfamiliar areas, very sensitive skin, burning, swelling eyes, yeast infections, and after using Protopic I started to get styes in my eyes and even a cyst in my arm. These were all very strange symptoms to me and a sign that something was not normal.

8. Is your family supportive? Friends?

Yes, my mother and boyfriend were extremely supportive and believed in TSW after I explained the situation thoroughly.

9. Have you ever been to a hospital for this? Why?

No.

10. What has been the hardest part of this condition?

Physically, it was very difficult. But mentally – I was really a wreck at about one year into my withdrawal and I had to see a counselor. I was in a very, very dark place and couldn’t sleep, hated having to go through the day, and was in a lot of pain – I was so depressed. Worst experience of my life was the mental toll this took on me.

11. How long have you been in withdrawal? 

April 2014 / August 2016. I would say it took 26-28 months for me to say I’m definitely healed.

12. What do you use as comfort measures during this?

I got a prescription for muscle relaxers to help me sleep.

13. Are you employed? Has this affected your job status?

I am employed and I stayed employed during my whole withdrawal. The only time I took off was two weeks last summer to collect myself mentally when it was getting really tough.

14. Have you gone to therapy/wish to go to therapy because of this condition?

Yes, I had to see a therapist. It helped me a lot – just to have someone to talk to and to see their outside perspective.

15. If there is one thing you could say to another sufferer, what would it be?

This will be one of the hardest things you will ever have to do in life. Period. It will end, but it is a long, difficult process and you will need support from friends and family (and hopefully a doctor). It’s a very hard situation to explain to other people (especially traditional dermatologists), and it’s even hard to understand what your body is going through when you’re suffering from it. And as hard as it is to believe, you will look back on this experience as a tiny fraction of your life. A period of your life that REALLY sucked but it ended. It DOES end.


Thank you for such a terrific interview, Mattiel!

Interview #8: Stephanie Miller

stephamie-millerStephanie Miller

Brooklyn/Queens, NY

‘At the end of the day, we can endure more than we think we can’–Frida Kahlo 

‘Be easy, take your time. You are coming home to yourself’—Nayyirah Waheed

 

1.When did you start using topical steroids? And why?

I think it started when I was about 6. I was definitely in elementary school at the time. I developed regular eczema when I started a new school, and my parents took me to the dermatologist. That’s when they started to give me ‘rash medicine’ as my family always called it. I never went to bed without putting “medicine” on my skin.

2. What was the name of the topical steroid?

I don’t remember the first potency they gave me, but I do remember they kept prescribing more potent ones as my body became ‘immune’ to the less potent ones. That’s what the doctors always said was happening…*eye roll*. I remember having tubes of all types of steroids all over the house, especially the tiny tester ones. Doctors would always give me handfuls of those.

3. Were you ever prescribed more potent steroids? 

Yes, I used every topical steroid under the sun until they prescribed Clobetasol when I was 14. During the summer before high school, my family moved to a new town, and I remember my skin getting better. Between high school and college, eczema was never an issue. I may have put dabs of steroids on my skin every now and then, but it definitely burned out as doctors said it would. However, during the summers between college, I started working at a summer camp in my old hometown. Within 3 weeks, my eczema came back. But then, when I would fly back to Massachusetts where I went to school, the eczema would go away. By my fourth summer at the summer camp, my eczema returned ferociously. I went to the dermatologist where they immediately gave me Clobetasol and Protopic. They said use the Protopic regularly, and the Clobetasol occasionally. Well, the Protopic didn’t work…so I used Clobetasol…and boy did that work wonders. I am pretty positive that’s when my addiction started. After that summer, I moved to NYC. It was September 2011. My skin was still a major struggle, but I didn’t let it stop me. I had my tube of Clobetasol just in case. For the record, I used it as prescribed….”twice a day (morning and night) for 2 weeks”. Usually I would only need it for a week, then my skin would clear up! But, as the story goes, when that week or 2 weeks of using the cream ended, my “eczema” would come back with a vengeance within 2 to 4 weeks. I thought I was allergic to the city, but I loved it too much to leave. From 2011 to the beginning of 2015, that was my struggle. My right palm suffered the most, but I would also get small patches on my arms, my torso, and legs. I knew I shouldn’t be using steroids long term, so I tried to avoid it. I would only use it when my skin became unbearable. The relief was always worth it even if it only lasted a month, 2 weeks, or less.

4. How did you find out about RSS?

Back in January 2015, I used topical steroids for the last time, and my “eczema” came back within a week and started to spread to places I had never seen it before… and it was spreading fast—the backs of my hands, big patches on my legs and arms, my left palm. That was a huge wake up call. I decided to take control of my “eczema”, and went on the autoimmune protocol diet for 6 weeks. I was promised that I would see great healing after a month, but my skin only got worse and worse. As I was doing research on ways to heal eczema naturally, I kept coming across ITSAN. When I initially learned about it, I was in denial. I was convinced that if I kept up with my diet, I would heal. Well that didn’t work. I stayed on a pretty strict diet for 5 months, and my skin only got worse.

5. What made you feel you had RSS?

As I continued my research, ITSAN kept popping up on Google. Once I actually looked at the pictures closely, I knew instantly that my skin looked EXACTLY the same. I also remember looking at Briana’s blog, and her pictures looked like my skin!  It was surreal. I thought I was looking at my own hands, my own legs, my own arms. Then I distinctly remember watching the animated videos that ITSAN made…that story was my story….I stopped breathing and burst into tears. I felt a huge weight lift off of my shoulders. I remember watching Dr. Rapaport’s interview immediately after and felt a huge sense of relief. I WAS GOING TO BE ECZEMA FREE. The journey would be hard, but I WOULD HEAL.

6. Were you diagnosed by a doctor? Did you have a supportive doctor?

Nope and nope. I diagnosed myself.

7. What were your first symptoms?

Spreading red rashes that began to cover my hands…and I mean my whole hands. Also, within 3-4 weeks, I had the infamous red sleeves and pant legs.

8. Is your family supportive? Friends?

I don’t live near my parents, so they didn’t have any control. They were emotionally supportive from afar, but I do think they would have questioned my choice if they actually witnessed what I was going through. Now that I have made a ton of progress, they are very supportive of my decision. My friends were supportive, but I kept very quiet about it for the first 4 months. I didn’t start owning the condition until month 5 or 6. Even while I was suffering during the worst of it, I was so disconnected from my body, that I wasn’t feeling anything. I covered everything up and numbed myself as I continued with my life9. Have you ever been to a hospital for this?

9. Have you ever been to a hospital for this? Why?

Oh yes. Back in May of this year, 2016, I was 15 months or so in. I was still suffering terribly from my anniversary flare. It had spread full body, which was a lot worse than my initial flare. At the very end of April, I suddenly felt a strong pain on my right side…right under my armpit. Within, 2 hours I got a fever of probably 102. I went home, tried to sleep it off for the next two days, but my fever wasn’t breaking and the pain kept spreading. On May 1st, I went to urgent care. They took my vitals and said I had to be rushed to the hospital. I was going into septic shock. They took a ton of blood, hooked me up to antibiotics and fluids. I don’t remember the chronology, but essentially within a day or two, they found strep and staph in my blood. My lungs were filling up with fluid, and my right breast was infected with mastitis. They also gave me a hydrocortisone IV, which I was very hesitant at first…but at that point, I just wanted them to save my life. My skin cleared up for a week! Woohoo! It looked strong and beautiful. Looking back, I’m grateful that I agreed to it because the nurses were taking my blood multiple times a day. That would have been even more of a nightmare if my skin was still flaming red. However, after the first week of clear skin, the redness and rashes started to creep up on me and grow, which proves that it was the steroids that caused all of my problems. Anyways, I was in the hospital for a total of 17 days. I had reoccurring fevers for most of the two weeks because my body was still trying to fight the infection. I’ve made a full recovery though!!

10. What has been the hardest part of this condition?

The rebound flare definitely. By January of 2016, I thought in my deepest heart that my skin was only going to get better. By February, my anniversary flare started to spread. By April, I was in an almost full body flare. I didn’t struggle with that at all during my initial one. The days when you wake up and know it’s only getting worse are the hardest. You never know when you’ve reached the abyss before you turn a corner and start to heal. You just have to breathe, suck it up, and do whatever you can to stay comfortable.

11. How long have you been in withdrawal? 

I’ve been at it for almost 21 months. Unfortunately, now I am struggling with the fact that since I got the hydrocortisone IV in the hospital, I’m technically not 21 months into my withdrawal. I’m almost 6 months steroid free. But, I’ve been suffering for 21. I started my initial withdrawal unknowingly in mid January of 2015, and I’m doing really well right now.

12. What do you use as comfort measures during this?

Anything to make me laugh. Last year, I re-watched all 10 seasons of Friends. The Office is also another comfort show.  I also realized how important my close friends are to me, and I recognized that they are the ones that make me feel human. That was also a major psychological struggle during this journey. Since you’re physical self is such a mess, you feel inhuman. Your body doesn’t feel like yours. For the past 2 years, my limbs have felt like these other disgusting creatures that I have to nurture. They’re not mine….they’re not mine…

13. Are you employed? Has this affected your job status?

No, fortunately this hasn’t affected my job status, except when I was in the hospital. I’m a nanny, and the family was very understanding and allowed me to care for their child however it suited my needs. Fortunately, my face was never severely affected, so I was able to hide my condition under long sleeves and gloves.

14. Have you gone to therapy/wish to go to therapy because of this condition?

No…but I need to. I’ve done this completely alone. No caregivers. I’ve had friends to talk to and cry to…but I’ve been able to pretend that I’m fine. I talk about it as if it hasn’t affected me…but it has…and it’s been really fucking hard to face it.

15. If there is one thing you could say to another sufferer, what would it be?

It’s a gift. Fucking trust me. Your quality of life will transform. It will develop on its own time. Healing is not linear. It’s not it’s not its not. This, my love, will only make you stronger. YOU. ARE. A. WARRIOR.

Just be. Listen to your body. Don’t beat yourself up about anything. There’s no right way to heal. You have to trust your gut and take action on your own time. Everyone’s journey is drastically different, and we can’t compare. The only things that remain true amongst all of us are…and I mean all of us…the story, the symptoms, and the moment you realize you have RSS are all the same. And it’s one of the most empowering discoveries you’ll ever experience.

Oh and take pictures, especially at your worst. You won’t regret it. You’ll forget how much pain you were in, and the pictures are a reminder that you are a fucking warrior. Don’t ever underestimate that.

Last, but not least….

You are loved.


You are certainly loved, Stephanie! Thank you for a lovely interview!

Interview #7: Maja Ster

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAMaja Ster

Slovenia

‘I am strong and I love myself for fighting this condition so bravely – worsen my symptoms, stronger my love. If I can fight this, I can do anything. I am unstoppable.’

1.When did you start using topical steroids? And why?

I started using topical steroids when I was around seven years old. I got Atopic Dermatitis and due to my symptoms my dermatologist prescribed me my first corticosteroids. My parents didn’t like them, but of course wanted to help me, so they followed medical instructions. I was very itchy at the time and had patches of red and dry skin on a few parts of my body (especially arm and leg joints). So we started applying steroids – who will you trust if not a doctor?

2. What was the name of the topical steroid?

Advantan

3. Were you ever prescribed more potent steroids? 

Yes. I was applying Advantan to my skin regularly through all my childhood, never been told that it could be mixed with a cream to be less potent. So I had been using 100 % topical steroids all the time (not very heavily though) and as a teenager realized that they had no real effect on my skin anymore. I got more potent corticosteroids around my 18th year from my dermatologist. They were called Elocom.

4. How did you find out about RSS?

I was searching through the internet to find a new solution for my skin, because I had one of my bad skin days that day. And I somehow found a blog, written by a girl from nearby town, saying that she had been two years into withdrawal of corticosteroids at that time. She wrote that topical steroids worsened her skin condition and as she had realized later – made her addictive. When I was reading those lines, I stopped breathing and I started to shake. She wrote about her withdrawal process, how bad her skin had been on the beginning and through the whole withdrawal, how she didn’t know if she would survive. I was crying and crying and crying. Because I knew at that point – that I was addicted too.

5. What made you feel you had RSS?

I knew when I read the first post on that blog. It was like someone would finally told me the truth I had already knew. Corticosteroids never felt good on my skin (apart from immediate effect it had on my skin) and my skin was like a wax or something artificial after applying them. I knew because my skin has changed in years of TS usage. Inflammation started to spread over my whole body and it appeared on places not typical for Atopic Dermatitis too. My outbreaks were unpredictable and uncontrollable, it came in seconds and bursted over my whole body.

6.What were your first symptoms?

Fizz with liquid inside and dry red burning patches of skin. Bone deep itch that was stronger than anything that I had ever felt in my life. In the first few days of withdrawal over my hands, arms and back. In the first month over my whole upper body and around month three over my whole body. Shivering of cold in the middle of summer (all together for four VERY LONG months), the shivers, feeling of ants crawling under my skin, heavy shedding of my skin, heavy sweating (for a few months, especially at night), hyper sensibility of skin to everything – from fabric to food and even to my own touch. Insomnia. Oozing, soreness of skin, deep devastating hopelessness and entrapment of my happy outgoing soul in my waning weak sore body.

7. Is your family supportive? Friends?

I am so happy to have my boyfriend, who is super supportive through this whole process. My friends too and my family – it is hard to accept something so brutal, so they needed their time to accept / understand. It was (and still is) hard for them too.

8. Have you ever been to a hospital for this? 

No, fortunately not.

9. What has been the hardest part of this condition?

Accepting that this is it. That everything I have loved and cared about has to be put aside for an indefinite time because my symptoms are taking everything I have away from me. My time, my energy, my patience, my will to live. Itch itself has been so devastating that after a ‘good’ itch attack (sometimes on a bad day even on every two hours or less), I have been left with nothing. Empty shell. All my energy was wasted on that insane itch and to stay sane I had to turn myself off afterwards. I had to stop thinking about everything else and had to focus on just being.

Accepting that all my dreams, desires, wishes, all my hard work to became good at something, to accomplish something, had to be forgotten for that long never-ending period of time. Accepting the feeling of frozenness in the moment, when (almost) everyone around me had lived their lives on like nothing had happened.

Like I would be nearly dying next to them and they wouldn’t even notice. That was the worst.

The inability to explain to my closest people what I was going through in the way that they would really understand. And the inability to do all those things I had wanted to do so badly (from going for a walk or shower without pain to doing my hobbies – later in the process I started to hanker badly for creativity, productivity and physical activity).

10. How long have you been in withdrawal? 

I have been withdrawing from 28. January 2015, so one year and 9 months until now. I am not over with withdrawal yet, but I am feeling much better now. I think that it will take one more year or even two or three to be completely healed.

11. What do you use as comfort measures during this?

I had a no-diary, no-gluten and no-sugar diet for my first 8 months of withdrawal. I don’t know if it has helped on the recovery process, but at that time I reacted to practically everything and I was using the diet as my ‘power’ to have at least something in control. I am using moisturizer creams now (Avene Xera Calm Balm and Zinc Oxide) and I bath when my symptoms worsen (with apple vinegar or sodium bicarbonate). I use tubifast strapping in that case too.

12. Are you employed? Has this affected your job status?

Yes, I am, as a student worker. In the beginning of Topical Steroid Withdrawal I had been very lucky to just complete my studying, but had not yet graduated – and I could take one extra year off as a student. I didn’t had to work so hard that year, because I had still lived with my parents, so I didn’t had to worry about my finances so much, which was a life saver.

I had to stop many student jobs and hobbies on the other hand, which affected my life a lot. And it was hard (and still is) starting to do those things again because I lost so much specific knowledge after a year and a half of not doing it. But I’m starting to learn and explore again and I am ready to live a much fuller life now.

13. Have you gone to therapy/wish to go to therapy because of this condition?

I think that I will recover my whole life from the withdrawal. From time to time I cry heavily remembering my worst months and meeting my darkest hidden demons, which is a kind of therapy too.

I believe that my therapy will be all the things that make me happy and touches my soul. I will be recovering through dancing, being with all the people that mean the world to me, hiking (hopefully without the itch) and deep conversations with myself and my closest people from time to time.

I truly started to love myself through that process and that is why I am grateful for it. I believe it was meant for me to overcome TSW and it made me know myself 100 times better.

I see my path now. And I’m ready to start walking it.

14. If there is one thing you could say to another sufferer, what would it be?

You are strong and very brave. Don’t ever doubt about that. If life had thrown you into that terrible process, you had to be strong and brave enough to fight it, why else would you be the one thrown there? Don’t step on the path towards healing in the role of the victim, but tell yourself that you can do it, that you are a victor!! Embrace the pain and love yourself deeply through that process. It is not fair, it could be prevented, but don’t stress about that through your darkest nights. Focus on surviving, do all you have to do to come through. And remember, it becomes EASIER and it ENDS eventually. IT REALY DOES!

Be grateful for having the symptoms that won’t last your whole life, but ‘just’ a few years. That may sound negative, but it really puts things in perspective. It could be worse! You can always be grateful for something, and that makes life (and even the symptoms) much more tolerable. Be your own comforting inner voice saying: ‘I am strong, I am beautiful, I can do anything, I will manage the next minute / hour / day and I will NEVER give up!’


Spectacular, Maja! Thank you for your interview!

Interview #6: Maartje Francisco

maartje2016Maartje Francisco

Holland

“You will never get better until you stop trying to get better”

1.When did you start using topical steroids? And why?

I started applying when I was 16, because the doctors said I had children-eczema that I would grow out of eventually. So we used it for my neck and nipples.

2. What was the name of the topical steroid?

Bethametasone (potent 3)

3. Were you ever prescribed more potent steroids? 

When I was 24 I took a allergy-test with the derm and nothing came out so they gave me potent 4, dermovate. To apply on my hands/wrists.

4. How did you find out about RSS?

I’m a typical case of Topical steroid addiction, one day I googled this in Dutch first but I couldn’t find anything. I had a feeling I really needed the TS to make it normal again. For a while. But then it would come back within 5 days or so. I stumbled on the itsan website, saw the animated clip and it was such an eye-opener!

5. What made you feel you had RSS?

My hands and arms would gradually worsen and it burned, was bright red and spreaded like fire. With the dryness after every flare.

6. Were you diagnosed by a doctor? Did you have a supportive doctor?

No, I am a beautytherapist so this was a crazy but educational and inspiring ride for me! I found a great product for my company and skin and the manager in Holland of this product is Chinese and she knows a lot about TSW and the Chinese derms that dó treat this in different ways but without TS.

7. What were your first symptoms?

Itchiness, redness, and burning.

8. Is your family supportive? Friends?

YES! And it is oh so important, my mother is the strongest person I know and I couldn’t have done it without her. My husband, father, sister and kids have been by my side the whole ride. Some friends were interested and asked how it would go sometimes. But as we all know, if you don’t go through this you really don’t know what it is.

9. Have you ever been to a hospital for this? 

I made an appointment with a derm to get UVB Therapy. I got it at home! That was great for winter 2015.

Had a skin infection one time through TSW and I was on antibiotics for one week.

10. What has been the hardest part of this condition?

ITCHENESS! And the lack of sleep and almost no physical contact. But after all, the mental struggles on bad days are the hardest.

11. How long have you been in withdrawal? 

Im 31 months in now, but I stopped counting after 2 years, because it became bearable after that, and I got to do everything I wanted to do again. But I think I’m not healed yet.

12. What do you use as comfort measures during this?

Dermaviduals, my skinbarrier creams.

13. Are you employed? Has this affected your job status?

I have my own business. I worked throughout the whole process but of course it affected everything. But for the better…at the end.

14. Have you gone to therapy/wish to go to therapy because of this condition?

For a while, and it was more in a coach/mindfulness-way than a psychologist.

15. If there is one thing you could say to another sufferer, what would it be?

One day at a time, and time will heal!


Amazing interview! Thank you tons, Maartje!

Interview #5: Caroline Langdon

caroline-langdonCaroline Langdon

Adelaide, South Australia

“You are the sky. Everything else – it’s just the weather.” ― Pema Chödrön

1.When did you start using topical steroids? And why?

I was treated with steroid cream from infancy for atopic eczema.

 

2. What was the name of the topical steroid?

My mum thinks the first steroid cream was called Celestone.

3. Were you ever prescribed more potent steroids? 

Yes. All kinds. All strengths. For eczema.

As a young child I had severe eczema and was prescribed mild to strong steroid creams and ointments for different parts of my body. I think from around the age of twelve, I started using it on my face as I’d developed eczema there as well. Mostly around my eyes and mouth at that point. By the time I was a young adult I used steroid creams and ointments on and off, of varying potencies.  On my face and different parts of my body. By this time I knew steroids were not a great option long term and endeavoured to use them sparingly.

I tried all manner of things for managing my eczema naturally (without steroids), via nutrition, supplements, lifestyle, natural creams/potions etc…. but my skin would eventually become completely unmanageable after a few mths if not before. I would need to use steroids again to control my eczema, so that I was able to sleep, work, care for my children and function properly. They suppressed it, it worked temporarily/superficially, that is, until it didn’t. Such a vicious cycle.

4. How did you find out about RSS?

I typed into my computer something like: red, burning, severely itchy skin… and eventually stumbled onto ITSAN.

5. What made you feel you had RSS?

I was desperate to find out what was happening with my skin, it was not like the eczema of my past (though that was no walk in the park, this was much worse). It was often red, itching and burning. It didn’t matter how great my diet was or what else I tried, it kept getting worse and spreading to areas I’d never had eczema before. My asthma and hayfever were super bad on top of it. I’d always been an allergy prone person but I seemed to be allergic to everything! I was getting nowhere with the dermatologist I’d been seeing, except sicker and sicker. My skin was so unmanageable, it was affecting every facet of my life! He had me back on steroids telling me I had eczema urticaria and said, ‘Many people have to manage it with steroids the best they can the rest of their life, you’re not the only one!’ (I think this was meant to be comforting??). He put me on an immunosuppressant drug used for cancer and transplant recipients, which is what they give people with very bad skin conditions too I discovered but I agreed as was desperate.

My immune system was at such a low ebb, I felt so sick and run down and I had skin that was red, burning and incessantly itchy most of the day/night.

I indeed wanted relief but I didn’t want to be taking these drugs for the rest of my life, especially when I seemed to be getting progressively worse, not better!!

There had to be a better answer.

I was in such despair. I started googling my symptoms, things like ‘burning, red skin/ hives/ rash spreading to new areas/ relentless itching/ palpitations/ severe anxiety/ no sleep etc’ and found other people who described EXACTLY what I was experiencing and going through, the common thread having been the use of topical steroids.

Then I stumbled across ITSAN which was such a relief.

I had finally found a site and support group (so many people going through exactly the same thing as me!) that talked about Red Skin Syndrome.   The site linked many studies and medical publications about how Topical steroids can cause this condition in the body …..and people were finding a way to overcome it!!

Stop using them!! Ha, sounds easy right? Not so. If it were easy to stop them, I guess there wouldn’t be so many using them. Hardest thing I’ve ever done!! Also the best thing I’ve ever done!!

6. Were you diagnosed by a doctor? Did you have a supportive doctor?

No I wasn’t but my gp had seen me get progressively worse over time. When I told her that I believed it to be the steroids promoting the condition and shared info from ITSAN and others experiences with her, she found it to be very plausible, though she had never seen anybody else that was in the state I was in personally. She’s an Integrative Medicine GP so she was very supportive in monitoring me, etc. I don’t know what I would have done without her in those first 12 months, for moral support alone!

I had a great naturopath as well. Very lucky in this respect.

7. What were your first symptoms?

Spreading rashes, hives, red skin, burning sensation, crazy itchiness, sore eyes, poor sleep, heart palpitations, anxiety, depression.

8. Is your family supportive? Friends?

Yes, I’m so grateful to those who were/are.

I fell out of touch with many people though (or they with me). Mostly because I could no longer go out and socialise for quite a long time. It’s a very isolating experience in that sense.

9. Have you ever been to a hospital for this? 

In the early weeks of tsw, I was in a very severe state and had come up on the waiting list with the Dermatology Dept at the hospital.

After my previous experience with the dermatologist I wasn’t sure about going but was in such a bad way, thought I should keep the appointment because at that particular point, I felt like I was close to dying, no kidding! I had no idea how, or if the body could cope with this for much longer. Complete head to toe, burning, red, oozing and tremendous oedema. My face and entire body was filled with fluid and leaking it out everywhere at the same time. Nobody who knew me would have recognized me, I barely recognized myself. I walked in, in a knee length cotton night singlet, which was agony in itself. At home I couldn’t wear anything it was so painful. I looked like a maniac, itching insanely everywhere. The nurse at the counter got a cold, wet sheet and threw it over me, it was heaven for counteracting the heat in my body. By the time I was called in to see the dermatologist, I was shivering like crazy. I tried to explain that I had been reacting badly to steroid treatment and had ceased using any creams in the last few weeks.
They deemed me ‘critical’ and that I should be admitted immediately! I asked how they would treat me if this happened and they said with steroid wet wraps and oral cortisone.   I said that steroids were responsible for what had gotten me into this mess and so that was not an option really.

They basically said, ‘Oh well, if that’s not what you want we can’t help you today… but how do you think you will manage this by yourself at home’. I was gobsmacked, I thought they may have been able to provide some help or checking of vitals etc to make sure they weren’t sending me on my way if they were deeming me ‘critical’!

I said, ‘I don’t know, I guess I’ll go to my gp and get her to monitor me, make sure there is no infection, or something..’, to which they responded, ‘oh, your gp won’t be able to do anything for this’.

If you don’t want to be steroid tempted, hospital is not the place to go. I walked out and went home. It was truly the hardest yet best thing I could have ever done for myself.

10. What has been the hardest part of this condition?

The debilitating and painful nature of it, the fact that it unpredictably effects not only the skin but many aspects of the body’s internal and systemic functions. The continuous lack of sleep. The fact that it takes an undetermined length of time to recover from. Hmm, I guess there have been a few hard parts.

11. How long have you been in withdrawal? 

I’ve been in withdrawal since February 2014, so 33mths so far.

12. What do you use as comfort measures during this?

Tsw support groups have brought much comfort along the way.

Baths with Epsom and ACV (apple cider vinegar), icepacks, pressure bandaging, soft cotton clothes and bedding.

Sudocrem and Robertson’s skin repair ointment.

Meditation and drawing.

Good food.

Reading .

Many things but these are the staples.

13. Are you employed? Has this affected your job status?

I have been unemployed throughout tsw. Was unable to work and fortunate to be able to take time to repair my body. Have been doing some volunteer work but am only just recently beginning to seek work again. It’s been a financial drain of the highest order.

14. Have you gone to therapy/wish to go to therapy because of this condition?

Yes, I went to see a psychologist over the first 2 yrs. I found it to be really helpful in keeping me sane. Fortunately for me, he was very interested in nutrition and health, had a good comprehension of the impact prescriptive drugs can have on effecting body chemistry, health and well-being. It was an incredible support at a time when I really needed it, he provided good counselling space for me. He also used hypnotherapy in some sessions to help with pain and itch management. It made a dent.

15. If there is one thing you could say to another sufferer, what would it be?

The intensity subsides.

Time and perseverance definitely has its’ rewards, IT DOES GET BETTER!

Trust that your body has incredible ability to right itself.

Tsw is a lesson in loving patience, with oneself.

That was more like four!


Caroline, thank you! Such an in-depth interview!