Depression Reversal

Ever thought about our stomachs affecting our thoughts and emotions?

“There is a huge and growing everyday body of evidence connecting the health of the gut to the health of the brain. In fact, there’s a saying in functional medicine, fire in the gut, fire in the brain, which means that if you have inflammation, parasites, small intestinal bacterial overgrowth, fungal overgrowth, or dysbiosis in the gut, then that is going to produce an inflammatory response that in turn affects the brain and can cause inflammation and a whole bunch of other problems in the brain, and this is not a fringe theory at this point. It’s true that unfortunately not a lot of primary care doctors or even psychologists or psychiatrists are aware of this connection, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t well established in the scientific literature. It absolutely is. And in fact, it’s been known for almost a hundred years going back to some research that was done at Duke in the early 1930s and 1920s connecting the gut and the brain and even the skin in this axis—the gut–brain–skin axis, which I’ve written and spoken about before.”

This podcast goes into a lot of detail about how inflammation, anywhere in the body, can affect our minds (the frontal cortex).

Also, Kresser talks about the HPA axis, or the hypothalamic–pituitary–adrenal axis. If we’ve learned anything about topical steroid dependency, we know that overuse can lead to a suppression of the HPA axis. And then, add chronic, everyday stress to the situation, and you’ve got a system that is extremely overloaded.

The last big subject he touches on is deficiencies in the body that could be contributing to depression. If we are lacking in certain vitamins and aren’t using it optimally in the body (methylation issues) then it can be throwing our balance off.

I highly recommend this podcast if you wish to catch his more in depth explanations on depression and inflammation in the body. What we are eating and lacking in our diet could  the reason we are mentally suffering and struggling to get through certain situations.

Kresser Podcast on Anxiety

Interview #7: Maja Ster

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERAMaja Ster

Slovenia

‘I am strong and I love myself for fighting this condition so bravely – worsen my symptoms, stronger my love. If I can fight this, I can do anything. I am unstoppable.’

1.When did you start using topical steroids? And why?

I started using topical steroids when I was around seven years old. I got Atopic Dermatitis and due to my symptoms my dermatologist prescribed me my first corticosteroids. My parents didn’t like them, but of course wanted to help me, so they followed medical instructions. I was very itchy at the time and had patches of red and dry skin on a few parts of my body (especially arm and leg joints). So we started applying steroids – who will you trust if not a doctor?

2. What was the name of the topical steroid?

Advantan

3. Were you ever prescribed more potent steroids? 

Yes. I was applying Advantan to my skin regularly through all my childhood, never been told that it could be mixed with a cream to be less potent. So I had been using 100 % topical steroids all the time (not very heavily though) and as a teenager realized that they had no real effect on my skin anymore. I got more potent corticosteroids around my 18th year from my dermatologist. They were called Elocom.

4. How did you find out about RSS?

I was searching through the internet to find a new solution for my skin, because I had one of my bad skin days that day. And I somehow found a blog, written by a girl from nearby town, saying that she had been two years into withdrawal of corticosteroids at that time. She wrote that topical steroids worsened her skin condition and as she had realized later – made her addictive. When I was reading those lines, I stopped breathing and I started to shake. She wrote about her withdrawal process, how bad her skin had been on the beginning and through the whole withdrawal, how she didn’t know if she would survive. I was crying and crying and crying. Because I knew at that point – that I was addicted too.

5. What made you feel you had RSS?

I knew when I read the first post on that blog. It was like someone would finally told me the truth I had already knew. Corticosteroids never felt good on my skin (apart from immediate effect it had on my skin) and my skin was like a wax or something artificial after applying them. I knew because my skin has changed in years of TS usage. Inflammation started to spread over my whole body and it appeared on places not typical for Atopic Dermatitis too. My outbreaks were unpredictable and uncontrollable, it came in seconds and bursted over my whole body.

6.What were your first symptoms?

Fizz with liquid inside and dry red burning patches of skin. Bone deep itch that was stronger than anything that I had ever felt in my life. In the first few days of withdrawal over my hands, arms and back. In the first month over my whole upper body and around month three over my whole body. Shivering of cold in the middle of summer (all together for four VERY LONG months), the shivers, feeling of ants crawling under my skin, heavy shedding of my skin, heavy sweating (for a few months, especially at night), hyper sensibility of skin to everything – from fabric to food and even to my own touch. Insomnia. Oozing, soreness of skin, deep devastating hopelessness and entrapment of my happy outgoing soul in my waning weak sore body.

7. Is your family supportive? Friends?

I am so happy to have my boyfriend, who is super supportive through this whole process. My friends too and my family – it is hard to accept something so brutal, so they needed their time to accept / understand. It was (and still is) hard for them too.

8. Have you ever been to a hospital for this? 

No, fortunately not.

9. What has been the hardest part of this condition?

Accepting that this is it. That everything I have loved and cared about has to be put aside for an indefinite time because my symptoms are taking everything I have away from me. My time, my energy, my patience, my will to live. Itch itself has been so devastating that after a ‘good’ itch attack (sometimes on a bad day even on every two hours or less), I have been left with nothing. Empty shell. All my energy was wasted on that insane itch and to stay sane I had to turn myself off afterwards. I had to stop thinking about everything else and had to focus on just being.

Accepting that all my dreams, desires, wishes, all my hard work to became good at something, to accomplish something, had to be forgotten for that long never-ending period of time. Accepting the feeling of frozenness in the moment, when (almost) everyone around me had lived their lives on like nothing had happened.

Like I would be nearly dying next to them and they wouldn’t even notice. That was the worst.

The inability to explain to my closest people what I was going through in the way that they would really understand. And the inability to do all those things I had wanted to do so badly (from going for a walk or shower without pain to doing my hobbies – later in the process I started to hanker badly for creativity, productivity and physical activity).

10. How long have you been in withdrawal? 

I have been withdrawing from 28. January 2015, so one year and 9 months until now. I am not over with withdrawal yet, but I am feeling much better now. I think that it will take one more year or even two or three to be completely healed.

11. What do you use as comfort measures during this?

I had a no-diary, no-gluten and no-sugar diet for my first 8 months of withdrawal. I don’t know if it has helped on the recovery process, but at that time I reacted to practically everything and I was using the diet as my ‘power’ to have at least something in control. I am using moisturizer creams now (Avene Xera Calm Balm and Zinc Oxide) and I bath when my symptoms worsen (with apple vinegar or sodium bicarbonate). I use tubifast strapping in that case too.

12. Are you employed? Has this affected your job status?

Yes, I am, as a student worker. In the beginning of Topical Steroid Withdrawal I had been very lucky to just complete my studying, but had not yet graduated – and I could take one extra year off as a student. I didn’t had to work so hard that year, because I had still lived with my parents, so I didn’t had to worry about my finances so much, which was a life saver.

I had to stop many student jobs and hobbies on the other hand, which affected my life a lot. And it was hard (and still is) starting to do those things again because I lost so much specific knowledge after a year and a half of not doing it. But I’m starting to learn and explore again and I am ready to live a much fuller life now.

13. Have you gone to therapy/wish to go to therapy because of this condition?

I think that I will recover my whole life from the withdrawal. From time to time I cry heavily remembering my worst months and meeting my darkest hidden demons, which is a kind of therapy too.

I believe that my therapy will be all the things that make me happy and touches my soul. I will be recovering through dancing, being with all the people that mean the world to me, hiking (hopefully without the itch) and deep conversations with myself and my closest people from time to time.

I truly started to love myself through that process and that is why I am grateful for it. I believe it was meant for me to overcome TSW and it made me know myself 100 times better.

I see my path now. And I’m ready to start walking it.

14. If there is one thing you could say to another sufferer, what would it be?

You are strong and very brave. Don’t ever doubt about that. If life had thrown you into that terrible process, you had to be strong and brave enough to fight it, why else would you be the one thrown there? Don’t step on the path towards healing in the role of the victim, but tell yourself that you can do it, that you are a victor!! Embrace the pain and love yourself deeply through that process. It is not fair, it could be prevented, but don’t stress about that through your darkest nights. Focus on surviving, do all you have to do to come through. And remember, it becomes EASIER and it ENDS eventually. IT REALY DOES!

Be grateful for having the symptoms that won’t last your whole life, but ‘just’ a few years. That may sound negative, but it really puts things in perspective. It could be worse! You can always be grateful for something, and that makes life (and even the symptoms) much more tolerable. Be your own comforting inner voice saying: ‘I am strong, I am beautiful, I can do anything, I will manage the next minute / hour / day and I will NEVER give up!’


Spectacular, Maja! Thank you for your interview!

Feature #14: Angelena & Naomi

angela-luck
Angelena Hope Luckeroth

Age: 28

Career: I was a server & and a guard at an art museum before I was forced by TSW to quit.  Went back to work at 5 months TSW in an entirely different capacity as a Personal Care Assistant & ceramic tilemaker.  Way less public positions.  I had to hid from the world for 5 months.  I felt subhuman, like a sewer mutant. With that said, embarking on TSW was the best thing I have ever done for myself and my health

When did you cease using topical steroids: Nov 11th 2015

What type did you use: Hydrocortisone 2.5 on face & neck. Triamincinolone full body, even on breasts

What is your favorite product for comfort? DSS (Dead Sea Salt) baths with a couple drops of Tea tree got me through the worst of it.  Spent SO MANY HOURS in the bathtub, sought refuge in the bathtub everyday.  I’m a MW (moisture-withdrawal) person so I never messed with creams & lotions much after embarking on TSW.

What is the hardest thing to deal with during this condition? TSW is crippling, it robs us of our precious time here on earth and alienates us from society.  I am a changed person forevermore.  I am humbled.  I feel like I have always had a great capacity for empathy and caring but this experience has brought me to a whole new level.

What is the first thing you will do when healed? I am going back to school to get my teaching license for Art k-12.  My skin condition (TSA) has ruled my life for far too long and I feel like once my withdrawal is complete I can move on with my life for the first time in YEARS.


Naomi Sarah Davies naomi

Age: 29

Career: Hospice Nursing Assistant

When did you cease using topical steroids: April 12th 2014

What type did you use: Dermovate, Betnovate, Elecon

What is your favorite product for comfort? Sudocrem (a UK zinc based cream) and tubigrip bandages

What is the hardest thing to deal with during this condition? The unrelenting severe pain and depression, not being able to mentally cope.

What is the first thing you will do when healed? I went on holiday and swam and got a tan!

Feature #13: Ariana & Hayley

ari-mundAriana Yunda

Age: 30

Career: unemployed due to TSW

When did you cease using topical steroids: August 23 2016 (third try)

What type did you use: I can’t remember every kind. I’ve been using for 29 years: hydrocortisone, prednisone, clobetasol, betamethasone, Elidel, Mometasone Furoate and tons of injected immunosuppresants like Bethaduo and Ciclosporine.

What is your favorite product for comfort? It changes, but lavender essential oil has helped as sleeping aid (I put it in my feet every night),  zinc oxide when oozing and lately a spray called MR. Wheatgrass that I put on my skin when I get out of the shower and reapply every time I feel dry. Any other moisturizer, whether it’s a cream or oil, burns.

What is the hardest thing to deal with during this condition? Having the symptoms of the shivers, the oozing, the no sleep, the crazy diets stopping my life.

What is the first thing you are going to do when you are healed? Jump in the ocean, work out and dance without worrying about my sweat burning. Start working again! I became a therapist in the process 🙂 I want to help others.


Hayley hayley-szabo

Age: 24

Career: Unemployed for two years due to TSW

When did you cease using topical steroids: 17 December 2014

What type did you use: Diprosone and advantan (very potent)

What is your favorite product for comfort? Zinc balm and ice packs!

What is the hardest thing to deal with during this condition? The severity of my facial symptoms, the lack of independence,  having to put my life on hold and the bloody heinous OOZE…

What is the first thing you are going to do when you are healed? I’m going to do everything I had to put on hold! I want to start working again, I want to go back to uni and get my masters, and I want to travel to Europe with my boyfriend!

Interview #6: Maartje Francisco

maartje2016Maartje Francisco

Holland

“You will never get better until you stop trying to get better”

1.When did you start using topical steroids? And why?

I started applying when I was 16, because the doctors said I had children-eczema that I would grow out of eventually. So we used it for my neck and nipples.

2. What was the name of the topical steroid?

Bethametasone (potent 3)

3. Were you ever prescribed more potent steroids? 

When I was 24 I took a allergy-test with the derm and nothing came out so they gave me potent 4, dermovate. To apply on my hands/wrists.

4. How did you find out about RSS?

I’m a typical case of Topical steroid addiction, one day I googled this in Dutch first but I couldn’t find anything. I had a feeling I really needed the TS to make it normal again. For a while. But then it would come back within 5 days or so. I stumbled on the itsan website, saw the animated clip and it was such an eye-opener!

5. What made you feel you had RSS?

My hands and arms would gradually worsen and it burned, was bright red and spreaded like fire. With the dryness after every flare.

6. Were you diagnosed by a doctor? Did you have a supportive doctor?

No, I am a beautytherapist so this was a crazy but educational and inspiring ride for me! I found a great product for my company and skin and the manager in Holland of this product is Chinese and she knows a lot about TSW and the Chinese derms that dó treat this in different ways but without TS.

7. What were your first symptoms?

Itchiness, redness, and burning.

8. Is your family supportive? Friends?

YES! And it is oh so important, my mother is the strongest person I know and I couldn’t have done it without her. My husband, father, sister and kids have been by my side the whole ride. Some friends were interested and asked how it would go sometimes. But as we all know, if you don’t go through this you really don’t know what it is.

9. Have you ever been to a hospital for this? 

I made an appointment with a derm to get UVB Therapy. I got it at home! That was great for winter 2015.

Had a skin infection one time through TSW and I was on antibiotics for one week.

10. What has been the hardest part of this condition?

ITCHENESS! And the lack of sleep and almost no physical contact. But after all, the mental struggles on bad days are the hardest.

11. How long have you been in withdrawal? 

Im 31 months in now, but I stopped counting after 2 years, because it became bearable after that, and I got to do everything I wanted to do again. But I think I’m not healed yet.

12. What do you use as comfort measures during this?

Dermaviduals, my skinbarrier creams.

13. Are you employed? Has this affected your job status?

I have my own business. I worked throughout the whole process but of course it affected everything. But for the better…at the end.

14. Have you gone to therapy/wish to go to therapy because of this condition?

For a while, and it was more in a coach/mindfulness-way than a psychologist.

15. If there is one thing you could say to another sufferer, what would it be?

One day at a time, and time will heal!


Amazing interview! Thank you tons, Maartje!

Feature #12: Carol & Bara

carol-arsenaultCarol Arsenault

Age: 67

Career: Graphic Artist part time

When did you cease using topical steroids: May 2015

What type did you use: I used Ultravate for hand eczema and  clobetasol for my lip

What is your favorite product for comfort? Favorite product was neem cream and dead sea salts

What is the hardest thing to deal with during this condition? Hardest part was the itching, not sleeping, clothes bothering me and the constant thinking about suicide.

What is the first thing you are going to do when you are healed? First thing I did since being almost cured – visit my sister.


Bara Křepínskábara-krepinska

Age: 15

Career: studying book culture in high school

When did you cease using topical steroids: 1/26/2016

What type did you use: I don’t remember what I first used as a baby, but my eczema disappeared, then reappeared with puberty – I used mild steroids like Advantan on and off for 3 years

What is your favorite product for comfort? Hairbrush for sratching, comfortable cotton hoodies and pajama pants

What is the hardest thing to deal with during this condition? It happened the year I was finishing primary school. The hardest part was losing all the months I could have spent with my friends lying on sofa under blanket and eating ice cream. I lost time in my life I can never get back and I’m so sorry for it.

What is the first thing you are going to do when you are healed? I have lots of things on my bucket list! Get multiple tattoos, pierce my nose (and other body parts), cut my hair and dye it crazy colors, wear bold makeup, wear wool, lace etc, grow long nails and do different nail art every day, and take long showers and long baths !

Interview #5: Caroline Langdon

caroline-langdonCaroline Langdon

Adelaide, South Australia

“You are the sky. Everything else – it’s just the weather.” ― Pema Chödrön

1.When did you start using topical steroids? And why?

I was treated with steroid cream from infancy for atopic eczema.

 

2. What was the name of the topical steroid?

My mum thinks the first steroid cream was called Celestone.

3. Were you ever prescribed more potent steroids? 

Yes. All kinds. All strengths. For eczema.

As a young child I had severe eczema and was prescribed mild to strong steroid creams and ointments for different parts of my body. I think from around the age of twelve, I started using it on my face as I’d developed eczema there as well. Mostly around my eyes and mouth at that point. By the time I was a young adult I used steroid creams and ointments on and off, of varying potencies.  On my face and different parts of my body. By this time I knew steroids were not a great option long term and endeavoured to use them sparingly.

I tried all manner of things for managing my eczema naturally (without steroids), via nutrition, supplements, lifestyle, natural creams/potions etc…. but my skin would eventually become completely unmanageable after a few mths if not before. I would need to use steroids again to control my eczema, so that I was able to sleep, work, care for my children and function properly. They suppressed it, it worked temporarily/superficially, that is, until it didn’t. Such a vicious cycle.

4. How did you find out about RSS?

I typed into my computer something like: red, burning, severely itchy skin… and eventually stumbled onto ITSAN.

5. What made you feel you had RSS?

I was desperate to find out what was happening with my skin, it was not like the eczema of my past (though that was no walk in the park, this was much worse). It was often red, itching and burning. It didn’t matter how great my diet was or what else I tried, it kept getting worse and spreading to areas I’d never had eczema before. My asthma and hayfever were super bad on top of it. I’d always been an allergy prone person but I seemed to be allergic to everything! I was getting nowhere with the dermatologist I’d been seeing, except sicker and sicker. My skin was so unmanageable, it was affecting every facet of my life! He had me back on steroids telling me I had eczema urticaria and said, ‘Many people have to manage it with steroids the best they can the rest of their life, you’re not the only one!’ (I think this was meant to be comforting??). He put me on an immunosuppressant drug used for cancer and transplant recipients, which is what they give people with very bad skin conditions too I discovered but I agreed as was desperate.

My immune system was at such a low ebb, I felt so sick and run down and I had skin that was red, burning and incessantly itchy most of the day/night.

I indeed wanted relief but I didn’t want to be taking these drugs for the rest of my life, especially when I seemed to be getting progressively worse, not better!!

There had to be a better answer.

I was in such despair. I started googling my symptoms, things like ‘burning, red skin/ hives/ rash spreading to new areas/ relentless itching/ palpitations/ severe anxiety/ no sleep etc’ and found other people who described EXACTLY what I was experiencing and going through, the common thread having been the use of topical steroids.

Then I stumbled across ITSAN which was such a relief.

I had finally found a site and support group (so many people going through exactly the same thing as me!) that talked about Red Skin Syndrome.   The site linked many studies and medical publications about how Topical steroids can cause this condition in the body …..and people were finding a way to overcome it!!

Stop using them!! Ha, sounds easy right? Not so. If it were easy to stop them, I guess there wouldn’t be so many using them. Hardest thing I’ve ever done!! Also the best thing I’ve ever done!!

6. Were you diagnosed by a doctor? Did you have a supportive doctor?

No I wasn’t but my gp had seen me get progressively worse over time. When I told her that I believed it to be the steroids promoting the condition and shared info from ITSAN and others experiences with her, she found it to be very plausible, though she had never seen anybody else that was in the state I was in personally. She’s an Integrative Medicine GP so she was very supportive in monitoring me, etc. I don’t know what I would have done without her in those first 12 months, for moral support alone!

I had a great naturopath as well. Very lucky in this respect.

7. What were your first symptoms?

Spreading rashes, hives, red skin, burning sensation, crazy itchiness, sore eyes, poor sleep, heart palpitations, anxiety, depression.

8. Is your family supportive? Friends?

Yes, I’m so grateful to those who were/are.

I fell out of touch with many people though (or they with me). Mostly because I could no longer go out and socialise for quite a long time. It’s a very isolating experience in that sense.

9. Have you ever been to a hospital for this? 

In the early weeks of tsw, I was in a very severe state and had come up on the waiting list with the Dermatology Dept at the hospital.

After my previous experience with the dermatologist I wasn’t sure about going but was in such a bad way, thought I should keep the appointment because at that particular point, I felt like I was close to dying, no kidding! I had no idea how, or if the body could cope with this for much longer. Complete head to toe, burning, red, oozing and tremendous oedema. My face and entire body was filled with fluid and leaking it out everywhere at the same time. Nobody who knew me would have recognized me, I barely recognized myself. I walked in, in a knee length cotton night singlet, which was agony in itself. At home I couldn’t wear anything it was so painful. I looked like a maniac, itching insanely everywhere. The nurse at the counter got a cold, wet sheet and threw it over me, it was heaven for counteracting the heat in my body. By the time I was called in to see the dermatologist, I was shivering like crazy. I tried to explain that I had been reacting badly to steroid treatment and had ceased using any creams in the last few weeks.
They deemed me ‘critical’ and that I should be admitted immediately! I asked how they would treat me if this happened and they said with steroid wet wraps and oral cortisone.   I said that steroids were responsible for what had gotten me into this mess and so that was not an option really.

They basically said, ‘Oh well, if that’s not what you want we can’t help you today… but how do you think you will manage this by yourself at home’. I was gobsmacked, I thought they may have been able to provide some help or checking of vitals etc to make sure they weren’t sending me on my way if they were deeming me ‘critical’!

I said, ‘I don’t know, I guess I’ll go to my gp and get her to monitor me, make sure there is no infection, or something..’, to which they responded, ‘oh, your gp won’t be able to do anything for this’.

If you don’t want to be steroid tempted, hospital is not the place to go. I walked out and went home. It was truly the hardest yet best thing I could have ever done for myself.

10. What has been the hardest part of this condition?

The debilitating and painful nature of it, the fact that it unpredictably effects not only the skin but many aspects of the body’s internal and systemic functions. The continuous lack of sleep. The fact that it takes an undetermined length of time to recover from. Hmm, I guess there have been a few hard parts.

11. How long have you been in withdrawal? 

I’ve been in withdrawal since February 2014, so 33mths so far.

12. What do you use as comfort measures during this?

Tsw support groups have brought much comfort along the way.

Baths with Epsom and ACV (apple cider vinegar), icepacks, pressure bandaging, soft cotton clothes and bedding.

Sudocrem and Robertson’s skin repair ointment.

Meditation and drawing.

Good food.

Reading .

Many things but these are the staples.

13. Are you employed? Has this affected your job status?

I have been unemployed throughout tsw. Was unable to work and fortunate to be able to take time to repair my body. Have been doing some volunteer work but am only just recently beginning to seek work again. It’s been a financial drain of the highest order.

14. Have you gone to therapy/wish to go to therapy because of this condition?

Yes, I went to see a psychologist over the first 2 yrs. I found it to be really helpful in keeping me sane. Fortunately for me, he was very interested in nutrition and health, had a good comprehension of the impact prescriptive drugs can have on effecting body chemistry, health and well-being. It was an incredible support at a time when I really needed it, he provided good counselling space for me. He also used hypnotherapy in some sessions to help with pain and itch management. It made a dent.

15. If there is one thing you could say to another sufferer, what would it be?

The intensity subsides.

Time and perseverance definitely has its’ rewards, IT DOES GET BETTER!

Trust that your body has incredible ability to right itself.

Tsw is a lesson in loving patience, with oneself.

That was more like four!


Caroline, thank you! Such an in-depth interview!